Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I wish you could order shots online.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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