just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
