what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
