he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
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