loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
