I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
