We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
