I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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