oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
