brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
