Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
