i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
well most of my day revolves around power hour
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize