there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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