I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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