Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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