Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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