Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize
