Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
