What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
