How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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