my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
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