You really coming over, don't trick.
I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Randomize
