im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
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