all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
im holly from the hills drunk
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
