Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Just took my morning after pill in the library
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
