yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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