The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Liz is crying about burritos again.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
