ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
