I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
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