Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
