Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
My life is pants optional.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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