I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
do herpes really smell.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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