Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
