I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
now i know why i became what i already was.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Randomize
