Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
You are a genius and a whore.
Randomize
