Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
