no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I need to sanitize my soul.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize
