is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
