You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize