I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
