Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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