Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
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