I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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