Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
