you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
