that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize