call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
