like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Randomize
