Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
