She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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