I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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